Seeing Through the Mistake
by Laurie Wilhelm
I was helping a friend, Linda, the other day – she wanted a shelf put up in her utility room and I confidently said I was the person to make it happen for her.
Being environmentally-friendly and all, we went to the hardware/building store hoping to score some off-cuts of lumber for the shelf and, sure enough, they had a crate full of other people’s cast offs. After finding the piece that would best suit our job and having it cut to the correct length, we proceeded to the checkout and returned home only to find out that we miscalculated the size. We measured the board twice, cut once, but didn’t measure the wall at all.
Back to the store with the wall measurements.
Back home with the lumber.
As predicted, I installed the shelf lickety-split (well, not really that fast, but they were put up eventually) and I declared myself a home-improvement hero. Head held high, I proudly left the utility room to announce my dominance at DYI jobs.
And then I saw it.
Two screws protruding through the wall into her hallway. And not just a little bit. Because the hardware store was all out of the shorter screws so I bought the long ones – better too long than too short, I said to myself.
Wrong.
What I didn’t take into consideration were her very narrow walls. Skinny walls, in fact. And there, in her hallway, were two long, pointy, shiny screws sticking out with bits of wall crumbling around them.
And what does this have to do with interpersonal relationship skills?
Nothing yet, but here it is:
Even before I re-did the shelf, patched up the holes and painted the wall, Linda thanked me. Not a sarcastic, mocking “thanks a lot” but a really thoughtful and sincere thank you.
Instead of being angry and frustrated with me, she told me that even though the shelf didn’t quite work out, she appreciated the effort that I put in to help (well, trying to help) her get this job done. She recognized that despite the mess I made of her wall she knew that my intention was good, even if my skill was lacking (which made me laugh). She even went so far as to tell me that she was thankful to have a friend willing to spend her day off giving her a hand.
Even though I felt like a home-improvement idiot, Linda’s words made me feel better and much less embarrassed. And I have to agree that my intention was good and my skill was lacking (at best). While I may not be doing any more “repairs” on her home, thanks to her generous spirit and words, I’ll certainly be there to help out as an assistant to a qualified repairperson.
I can relate. While I like to see myself as a DIY handy woman, alas, most times it would be far more efficient if I paid someone else to do it! Having said that, good on you for giving it a go. At least you got to spend the day with your friend!
Laurie: Thanks for looking on the bright side of this “situation,” Sami. I think I learned the hard way – as did my friend – to just call someone who knows what they’re doing. Of course, I did learn what I should do next time…