Interpersonal Skills: Shake It
by Laurie Wilhelm
I’ve seen several articles here and there offering advice on how to shake hands and I’ve always thought they were ridiculous. I mean, everybody knows how to shake hands, right? Really, it’s so obvious.
Well, I was wrong.
On different occasions in the last week, I was introduced to two individuals who had really, really bad handshakes. Even though they seemed friendly, had smiles on their faces and extended their arms like they knew what they were doing, they didn’t. They completely failed the handshake. In fact, these two didn’t even have handshakes. They had limp, wimpy, fingershakes.
So, I guess it’s true – there really are people out there who don’t know how to shake hands.
Limp handshakes don’t project confidence, self-assurance and professionalism. They project insecurity, self-consciousness, inexperience and apprehensiveness…and they feel awkward and clumsy to the receiver of the fingershake.
If you’ve never thought about your handshake, now’s the time to check it out. Let’s do a quick review of this very simple interpersonal skill – it’ll only take seconds.
1. Open your right hand so that your thumb is pointing up and extend your hand towards the other person.
2. When your thumb joints meet, lock hands – firmly but don’t squeeze.
3. Hold for a couple of seconds and release.
Be sure your hand is actually open – as soon as you start curling your fingers or pointing them downward, you’re setting yourself up for a floppy fingershake. To feel what an open hand is like, lay it flat, palm-side down, on a tabletop. While keeping it steady, lift it using your arm (no curling up your fingers or bending your wrist), keeping the form and turn it 90 degrees with your thumb to the ceiling. That’s an open hand ready for a good handshake.
That’s it. Easy.
Handshakes take only a few seconds but are important non-verbal contributors to making a good impression. Don’t allow someone to assume you’re insecure and unconfident based on a bad handshake. Know how gently, but firmly, shake hands so your initial interaction with the other person makes a positive impression.
photo©iStockphoto.com/LiseGagne
