The Importance of Greeting Others in the First 90-Seconds
by Laurie Wilhelm
Have you ever been greeted by someone who didn’t even look at you? Or when they asked, “How are you?” it was obvious that they really didn’t care how you answered? It probably didn’t do much to make you feel good, welcomed or that it even mattered you were there.
On the other hand, have you ever been greeted by someone who sounded truly happy to see you? Who stopped what they were doing to acknowledge you? Who had a smile on their face, asked you how you were doing and actually waited for you to respond? It probably made you feel special and that you mattered.
The importance of greeting others shouldn’t be overlooked. It’s the first opportunity we have to focus entirely on another person and the way we choose to use those initial seconds determines the tone of our interactions. When we greet someone warmly and focus on them with our undivided attention the conversation will most likely reflect that warmness. When we greet someone indifferently or are too busy to bother, we set up an interaction that will probably be of a similar tone – and we lose the opportunity to reinforce good relations.
When you can greet someone and in those first few seconds make them feel that they’re important to you and they feel good about themselves, chances are that you’ll have a better relationship with them and they’ll probably like you more. Making someone feel good in a matter of seconds is as easy as giving them a little extra, positive attention whenever you first see them.
Jim Fannin, the “Change your Life” Coach,” has put together a video about the importance of greeting one another and the impact it has on our relationships. In his video, The 90-Second Rule, he states, “If you’ve been away from someone who you really care about for at least two hours, the first 90 seconds that you’re with them has more impact on the relationship than spending hours and hours with them later.”
Fannin gives some good examples of what to do and what not to do. While his video concentrates on familial relationships, the skill of greeting others well extends to all our social relationships, be they at home or at work. Making the people around you feel good by giving them a warm greeting every time you see them builds stronger, friendlier relationships.
I’d like to thank Alex Shalman for introducing me to Fannin and the 90-Second Rule.
