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Our Responses Are Not Necessarily Those of Others

by Laurie Wilhelm
In a previous article, I was taking a look at our natural human tendancy to impose our personal emotions, perceptions or beliefs onto our understanding of others.
I’d like to share with you here …

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What Michael Scott Teaches Us About Communication

What Michael Scott Teaches Us About Communication

by Joan Curtis

How many of you watch The Office? If you’re like me, you may be addicted to it. A friend described the show’s appeal as like drinking beer. It has to grow on you. I agree with that analogy. I started watching the show out of curiosity. I spoke to a group of young people about communication. One young man said, “You must love The Office.” Not having ever watched this program, my curiosity was peeked.

Several engaging episodes later, I learned what this young person meant. The Office is a parody on communication. Steve Carell plays the boss, Michael Scott. He does a wonderful job of either not hearing what his staff says or totally ignoring their non-verbal messages. If you want to know how not to communicate here’s what Michael Scott teaches us:

• Focus entirely on yourself. When people are working, interrupt them with trivia so you can be center stage.

• Thrive on personal compliments. No matter how obvious the kissing up is, believe what people say and strut around as if that compliment was the nicest thing you ever heard. Be sure to reward those people who compliment you.

• Ignore innuendo. Whenever anyone says anything indirectly, ignore it. Only pay attention to the actual words being spoken. When character Jim raises his eyebrows, Michael never sees it. When character Stanley shakes his head in disgust, Michael never sees it.

• Play on people’s weaknesses not their strengths.

• Play up stereotypes. Whether dealing with an African-American, a Hispanic or a woman, play on those characteristics we assume to be true.

• Call staff meetings whenever in doubt about what to do next.

• When you learn that someone has undermined you, instead of dealing directly with the situation, get even with tricks you may have learned in elementary school.

• Ignore all sexual harassment rules by directly flirting with the women in the office.

• Use your office assistant to interrupt you with fictitious phone calls to make you look important.

• Punish people who bring you bad news even if the news is true.

• Delegate jobs you do not want to do.

This list is just a beginning. Perhaps you have a few you’d like to add. As you laugh at Michael Scott and the crazy behavior depicted on the sitcom, think about this question. How many of us have actually experienced similar shenanigans in our own offices?

Here’s an example that happened to me in a relatively “normal” office. One of my colleagues undermined me with another colleague. He told the person that I said things about him that I didn’t say. When I called that person, he cursed me out. Unaware of the sabotage, I was flabbergasted. I remember thinking one thing. Use only “I” statements. I did that for two reasons: 1) I-statements tend to prevent defensiveness. That person did not need to be more defensive. 2) By focusing on I-statements, I was able to keep my feelings in check. I could detach from the conversation.

Crazy things like this happen in offices throughout the world. The question you might ask is how you cope with them when they do. You can actually learn from Michael Scott. If you think what he did was right or good, then you might want to re-think your own office practices. As you watch the show, you’ll also see a spoof on upper management in a typical manufacturing environment. That, too, can be quite enlightening.

Joan Curtis, EdD is CEO of Total Communications Coaching where she specializes in helping smart, capable professionals move ahead in their careers by becoming skilled communicators and savvy leaders. She will release her third book in 2010. The New Handshake: Sales Meets Social Media published by Praeger Press tells you everything you want to know about the social media and sales. Written with Barb Giamanco, who worked as director of sales for Microsoft, this book is a must read for everyone confused by the social media and wanting answers. Check out Joan and Barb’s blog, www.TheNewHandshake.com. You can pre-order the book now at Amazon, Barnes & Noble or Books-A-Million.

Her new book, Managing Sticky Situations at Work: Communication Secrets for Success in the Workplace gives you everything you need to know to Say It Just Right!

Article Source: EzineArticles.com.

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